My Thoughts On...

Appropriate.

nobody@vox.com(Jenjen) — Wed, 23 Dec 2009 14:09:40 -0500

Nikkerz : Hahaha, awesome. So, how was your bonfire/mom time/ yibb embroidering?
Me: All of it's great! Still yibbing though (which I will call embroidering from now on because I love that) bonfire was incredible.
Me: Getting to be outside in the snow and be WARM! Amazing! And fire is so pretty and smell so good. AND WE HAD "Fekkin Whiskey" IRIIISH!
Nikkerz : OMG YAAAY! So, Jen. I've been thinking, and it really infuriates me that Lynn was shit-talking you when she first started talking to Chelsea. How is your life
Nikkerz : HER business?! I want to pummel her with my fists of fury.
Me: LMFAO!! I thought that last bit was a question. "So, Jen. I've been thinking. "important things" How is your life?" LOL It's not. She's just dumb.
Nikkerz: LOL!!!!! Wonderful.
Me: Yeah she's so nuts. There's nothing wrong with me and my life. They're a hell of a lot better than HERS. LOL btw mom said she duzn like
Nikkerz: Duzn like what? LOL
Me: my "hippy lifestyle". And I thought "she doesn't even KNOW about that?" All she knows is that I know YB and play drums and sleep on the floor.
Nikkerz : Weird. Maybe she thinks only hippies boycott mattresses? To go against the "man."
Me: Well, that and goats and granola. But she doesn't know about my free love, psychedelics, and dancing high on the beach all summer. XD
Me: LMFAO GOD YES!
Me: He really brings us down, you know. XD
Nikkerz: LMFAO! He does. He brings us so down we have to get HIGH! *lights one up*
Me: LMFAO Omg kuzn. If you ever take an interest in such things, let me know. XD It's amazing. And healthy. That's why the man bans it. XD
Nikkerz: Lmao healthy?!
Me: Yup. You can get prescriptions for it in California. Good for digestion, circulation, pain relief (I always have it for cramps), PMS, tummyaches, eyes, migraines, OCD, lack of appetite, fibromyalgia, tourettes, alcohol abuse, ADHD, arthritis, asthma, autism, bipolar disorder, cancer,depression, epilepsy, hypertension, urinary incontinence, leukemia, tumors,morning sickness, Parkinson's, posttraumatic stress disorder, sleep apnea, preventing Alzheimer's, so much.
Nikkerz: Ooo, wow. The more you know!
Me: Dude, fer serious. And there's more that I don't know. (LOL) It's amazing how much is suppressed by our govt. There are tons of pharmaceuticals that have things taken from the plant and turned into something damaging and spiritually devoid. Because that's what makes them patentable, and therefore profitable.
Nikkerz : Indians! They love it! With their spiiiirit!
Me: LMFAO OMG THEY DOOOO! But I know every rock and tree creature... has a life, has a spirit, has a naaaame.
Nikkerz: YAY TREE CREATURES!
Me: LMFAO SHIT! TREE AND CREATURE** Hooow HIIIIIGH (SUBLIMINAL?!!) does the sycamore grooow? If you cut it dooooown then you'll never knooow!
Nikkerz: LMFAO!!!! I CAN'T REMEMBER THE WORDS!!!
Me: OH NOO!!! I always connected with the injins with their tree creature spirits and not wanting to kill nature. I was even a hippy CHILDflwr.
Nikkerz: Moonflower McAlwaysbeenahippie!
Me: LMFAO I was a CPS hippy forever. in latchkey we'd play "indians" and play by the edge of the woods and try to "call the wind" braid flower stems.
Me: And we had ranks. like if the wind blew big when you called, you'd get to change your name. I was like, Little Daisy, then Running Deer. XD
Me: We did that like all the time in 3rd/4th grade. And play snow leopards. XD
Nikkerz: Lmao amazing. But GOD. You've changed so much, I don't even know you anymore. Oh, wait. I'm Lynn and I NEVER knew you!!!! LOL!!!!!!!!
Me: LMFAO OMG I KNOOOW! Out of fucking NOWHERE "WHAT?! I thought you were a male! I h8 u and im not ur friend anymore lolhahalol!"
Nikkerz: You should write a big huge Vox about all this. It would be amazing.
Nikkerz: LMFAO!!!!!! YES!!!!!
Me: OMFG I'LL JUST COPY PASTE!
Nikkerz: OMFG YAY!

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Stinky Dancer / Tea Hats

nobody@vox.com(Jenjen) — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 14:36:06 -0500

Wednesday, December 16th
2 or 3pm

Soooo Nicole (my bellydance teacher) just called to let me know that class was canceled tonight. I glanced out the window to find sunshine and not even the slightest hint of snow, so I was naturally all "Hmmmmmm?" She then went on to inform me that a skunk had crawled into the building, most likely on Sunday, to die. There is a team of dancers searching for it, all of whom went home stinky yesterday.

So, since the dance school is closed for two weeks over Christmas break anyway, that will give it plenty of time to air out (a little XD) and for me to practice my routine hardcore. Me and a couple other girls had to change spots because of the colors of our costumes having been mixed up (a PINK in the BLUE ROW?! NOH!) and I had to learn extra new stuff because of it. It'll be nice to have that well sunk (NOT SKUNK) into my memory before having the next part sprinkled on top.

Speaking of sprinkles, I really want a cookie. Speaking of sprinkles and cookies, those are cute as Girl Club, for which I have TWO OFFICIAL ITEMS ALMOST READY FOR SALE!!!

The first (a fur jacket AHAHAHA NOH) is a blend of tea I've created to be the official herbal tea of Girl Club, to be called "Liquid Candy". It's like a root beer float mixed with the goodness of Girl Club. Can't beat that with a pink frilly parasol. I plan to sell it in refillable drawstring teabags (and some in individual tea party sized tins), which I still have to get the material to make. It will be organic and cheesecloth-like. Like a tiny nutmilk bag!

The second (a flying car AHAHAHAHAHAH NOOOOOH) is this:

It's plushy, and you can wear it on your head! I just have to finish up some embroidery and attach the ribbon for head-tying. And then it will be the FIRST OFFICIAL GIRL CLUB ITEM FOR SAAAALE EVAAAR! Speaking of which, the Girl Club Boy donated another five cents yesterday, bringing us to a grand total of sixteen cents. He is (most likely) moving soon, and if he can find an appropriate Girl will be able to start a Chicago Sector of Girl Club. That will make our third, here being the first and secret location, the second being in Oklahoma.

We had our second Girl Club meeting on Saturday, where much was accomplished. And eaten. And the night ended with Aslynn falling asleep in the bathroom for a half hour while I played with the cat and her sister tried to get me to watch videos that are only funny if you're familiar with the topic... which I was not. So... cat. ^-^ And there were many honey pecans (AMAZING) and we swapped cute ideas, created the official tea, and decided how we're setting up the web comic. The first story-line will be about the two of us discussing the formation of Girl Club. We'll each tell the story from our own point of view, creating two separate stories that we don't discuss until we've put them up. After that, who knooows. It may get all Lucky Star ish with random shiz everwhar. But it's very exciting nonetheless. ^-^

I ALSO FOUND THE BEST PRESENT EVER FOR MY KUZN AND BESTEST FRIEND!!! BUT IT MAY NOT ARRIVE IN TIME TO SHIP WITH THE REST OF THE CHRISTMAS GOODIES! NUUUU! I'm just ordering it now, because it is amazing. And also I just found it. LOL

I watched kamikaze girls last night, and was soooo inspired by all of Momoko's "Baby, the Stars Shine Bright" sweet lolita clothes of frilly adorableness. That's very much like the style that Girl Club will have. Only a bit more modern (usually XD).

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Warm Lovin'

nobody@vox.com(Jenjen) — Mon, 07 Dec 2009 13:32:14 -0500

There's nothing like a warm cup of mead on a snowy day to put you where you need to be. --Me

It's rich and golden, sweet and mellow, and completely warms you through. I have to make another batch. The one I made a few months back ended up getting moldy because I neglected to put it in an air-tight container fast enough. What I'm drinking now is an Irish import, but it's not traditional mead using just honey, yeast, and water. This is a more quick version that contains white wine. Nevertheless, it is delicious.

On Tuesday of last week, I put in my two weeks notice because I just couldn't handle the constant harassment anymore. On Wednesday, Danny told me THAT would be my last day. He can never let his employees be in complete control of when they leave. He's just an ass like that. So, I didn't get to make my last five hundred dollars. But that's okay. I still have three months of rent saved up, plus two thousand in my savings account for a car or emergency.

So what am I doing now? Well, I'm enjoying a warm cup of mead and working for myself. I've decided to give a big "FUCK YOU! ^-^" to "The Man" (easy there, Moonflower) and use this opportunity to create food, clothes, jewelry, body scrubs, scented oils, general cuteness, etc. and sell it. And that is how I will support myself. Pure and simple. I'm determined to make this work, because it's what I truly want out of life. I live off of my art. My creativity. I refuse to waste my time on that which does not serve me (more than money).

Where my stuff will be:
Girl Club
Weird Experience

I should at least have something to list in Weird Experience within a week's time. I'll be putting my dehydrated food and non-Girl Club stuff in that store.

Wish me luck! ^-^

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Girl Club - Paving a Cute Road to the Future!

nobody@vox.com(Jenjen) — Sun, 29 Nov 2009 23:08:08 -0500

Or something. Asylnn and I (as the founders of Girl Club) have decided to start printing and selling Girl Club T-shirts. (T?) In so doing, we shall raise funds to purchase Girl Club's many necessities. What such purchases speak I of, you ask (more or less)? Well, Aslynn's aiming small for the first, making it a purchase of a roughly $20(US) gym-class type parachute for Girl Club Festivities and General Merry-Making.

I, however, have a master plan brewing beneath my... brain. A plan in which Girl Club plows the way to monetary income. The T- shirts are just the beginning. As amazing as they will be, they will spread through the Earth's many crevices and waves, to girls everywhere. And their parents. And their boyfriends. NO ONE WILL BE ABLE TO RESIST THE WONDERMENT OF EXPERIENCING GIRL CLUB!!! WE SHALL DOMINATE THE WORLD!!! And we can make it a company of many fashions, toys, cartoonies, cps, and eco-friendly/healthy stuffs. And it will grow to support us and other Girl Club Members who contribute in days to come, so that we may live free lives, accomplishing our True Wills as we create wonderful things (art, positive messages, hilariosity for the masses) and spread positive energy.

We currently have in our Girl Club Treasury eleven cents, donated by our Girl Club Boy upon his entry.

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I'm through.

nobody@vox.com(Jenjen) — Wed, 25 Nov 2009 18:29:25 -0500

Today started off as a good day. I felt refreshed and was happy with what I was doing as I bustled around the store. And then around nine or so Danny came in. And he started his usual bullshit where he'll ask Cliff why I haven't got the ten thousand things I have to do to open the store done in the first hour I've been there. And then Cliff will tell me that I need to tell Danny. And then Danny starts trying to "make my job easier and faster" by putting together a "system" that makes everything take twice as long to do, and have all the product look like crap. Very helpful. If you're fond of disasters.

So, naturally, I was infuriated when he started throwing all the bowls of food on a cart and then practically hurling them at me once they were in the juice bar, while I'm trying to figure out when the hell I'm supposed to look at the food and make sure it's... you know.... edible. So, he starts going back into the cooler to load it up again when I'm like,"I'll take it from here."

So, I'm all pissed off because he's making my job hell and trying desperately to prove that his way is right, because he worked in manufacturing and that makes him the world's expert on doing shit quickly. I was rushing around trying to unload the stupid cart and maneuver it around everyone and everything (which is insane because it's a very short distance from the cooler to the juice bar, but it's so tiny and so full of shit that it's impossible). Aaaand due to my frustration I was very forceful with my motions, so there was a bit of door kicking and some less than gentle placing of tubs of food on counters, but nothing too dramatic. It's not like I was punching walls like Young Bryan. But of course, only my actions of frustration are ever noticed. So I look like the crazy girl who freaks out about nothing, even though everyone working there is on the verge of a mental breakdown at least twice a week.

But anyway, Danny's brother, George, comes into the juice bar and starts spazzing out. Going on and on about how I need to learn to respect other peoples' property, how someone PAID for that door I just kicked. He's talking to me like he thinks he's my fucking father, like,"I've been watching you for a long time, and I don't like your attitude! I've heard you making comments, sayin','Well Danny can just get over it.' You need to learn some respect! That's Danny's name out there and if you don't like it you can walk out that door!"

And every time I'd think he was done and try to start to respond, he'd start YELLING and pointing his finger in my face, saying shit like,"I'M TALKING TO YOU! YOU LISTEN WHEN I'M TALKING TO YOU!!!"

And I filled up with unbearable rage and burst into tears. How DARE he talk down to me like that. Like he's my fucking father. I was ready to kill him. And Bryan was standing there the whole fucking time. Cliff practically had to drag him outside to punch the wall instead of George's big ugly beak for making me cry, while they dragged me into the office for a "meeting" with him and Danny. You have no idea how desperate I was to be anywhere but there.

I couldn't stop crying the entire half hour we were in there. And Danny didn't listen to a fucking word I said.

I'm through.

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Overall, a good day.

nobody@vox.com(Jenjen) — Tue, 24 Nov 2009 23:05:34 -0500

Still Tuesday (<---- No!)
11pm

I stayed home because my feet and back were so soooore that I could not bear to shuffle about a juice bar for eight hours in agony. I'm gonna talk to D. Dawg himself about cutting my hours so that I don't have to keep calling off from back-owies and near mental breakdowns.

With my free time I'll be able to do things like I did today:

Make tea
Buy an inexpensive camera on the internet.
Type journals.
Send emails.
Return phone calls.
Listen to soothing music.
Make a t-shirt pattern.
Practice yoga.
Partake in a fourth of a bit of blissful mind-altering paper.
Contemplate life, the universe, and everything.
Contemplate the Girl Club Ganesha-Squid god.
Make jewelry.
Do laundry.
Sleep in.
Do my makeup.
Fast.
Tune my chakras.
Go to the bank.
Look at cute little squirrels on the way home from the bank.
Ramble at Young Bryan about Einstein's theory of gravity while he's trying to read.
LBRP
Sit on the back porch and enjoy fall.

Amazing. I can do soh vereh much.

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Sad thought.

nobody@vox.com(Jenjen) — Tue, 24 Nov 2009 15:57:18 -0500

Tuesday, November 24th
3:57pm

I just got a letter telling when my recital will be.
June fifth.

So I went to write it on the calender, which of course only went to December and then ended.
So I went to tack the letter to the wall next to Bryan's yoga schedule.
Then I realized we wouldn't even be in this apartment in June when I'd need reminded of it.

Bryan plans to leave in the spring. I knew this. I've known this all along.

But something just hit me.

He won't see my first recital.
He won't see me dance.
He won't be there at all.

That's why I'm crying.

I love him.
And it feels like everything is ending.

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I can't figure out what I need to do.

nobody@vox.com(Jenjen) — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 23:03:29 -0500

Monday, November 23rd
10:24pm

I have a ton of energy coursing through me, and no matter how I try to use it, nothing seems like what I'm supposed to be doing right now. It's the most frustrating feeling. Sean came over and me, him, and Young Bryan were all playing our drums. I just couldn't get it right. It was one of those off-nights where you can't seem to keep a steady rhythm, or you lose your feel for every beat you start. And it made me go,"Oh, well I guess I shouldn't be playing my drum right now. I should do something else." And everything since then that I've thought of or started to do is just... not it. I can't find what I need. Sort of like when you're really hungry, and you have a taste for something, but you just can't place it. It's driving me crazy.

And it really doesn't help that its ten-thirty and I'm nearing the time when I'll do that thing where I lay down and suddenly it's time to go to work. I don't like having a job. I don't like money. Or that people have to use it in order to survive in most places. I need a place to go where I can be free. But I know the only place that can change my freedom-status is in my mind. I'm only as free as I let myself be. I can't be a slave to my thoughts. When I learn to control them I'll be free.

I don't write much these days. I don't like that.. I miss long days of solitude between my school days and work days. I'm so busy lately. I need a sabbatical hardcore. I hate my job. I'm so tired of being on my feet for eight hours, with some douche bags who don't know shit about shit breathing down my neck every time I blink. I just want to live my own life. Spend my time on more important things. Not be so exhausted when I do have some of my own time. I just want out.

But I don't know where to go.

The more I know, the less I understand.

On the bright side, I'm practicing driving and learning astrology.
And I'm getting really good at bellydance.
And I had amazing sex today.
Which caused the carpet to break the skin on my back.
And the neighbor to knock on the door.

So worth it.

93

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There are girls.....

nobody@vox.com(Jenjen) — Sat, 14 Nov 2009 23:53:04 -0500

11:53pm est

This moment marks the formation of Girl Club.

Cephalopod Scouts Division 32.

At present moment we have three official rules:

Respect my paper.
(Don't take drugs, kids... unless it isn't a Tuesday.) Just say NO to Tuesdays.
Never more than 1/2 over.

We don't need drums. We have Girl Club.
We have a Girl Club god.

He's the result of Ganesha gettin' jiggy with a giant squid.
And he's really cute.
He becomes angered when there are boys or drums in Girl Club.
We have a girl club boy. He's half girl now.
Mylar is essential.
As is absinthe.
And crayons.

Current missions:

Recruit more girls.
Color.
Keep out boys and drums.

Next meeting ... hopefully this coming weekend.

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Sexy World Peace

nobody@vox.com(Jenjen) — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 22:05:11 -0400

Thursday, October 15th
9-10pm

Two things are currently coursing through my mind.

The first is a very sudden and very strong desire to make out with a really beautiful girl with lips as soft as mine feel right now. There are, however, none currently in my apartment with me, and I wouldn't know where to begin to look for one within walking distance... in the dark and cold. Which brings me to thing two.

The Venus Project. And its activist arm, The Zeitgeist Movement.

If you're unfamiliar with the two things in thing two (XD) I highly recommend that you educate yourself on what they are. The easiest way is through this movie.

Zeitgeist: Addendum

Short in short, it's a whole new social system that will allow people to not have to work, but have access to everything they want without needing money, or a government.

It's beautiful and completely possible, so if you like the idea... spread it.

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