8 posts tagged “meat”

Beef & Cheese

Steak

Grill

Steak Knife

Barbeque Sauce

Tobasco Sauce

A-1

Beer

Meat

Burger

Brats (braaahhhhts)

Chili

Beans

Chili Cheese (whether it be on a hotdog or a burrito it is manly)

Jerky

Ketchup

Chops/Porkchops

Bacon

Fried

NOT SKILLET UNLESS USED IN SUCH A PHRASE AS THIS:  This is my skillet where my WIFE fries things, and then I HIT her with it!

Nachos

Pizza  ...   Speaking of which, we're about to go get some.  (Is that what she said?)

At Niki's

Saturday

November 22nd

10:12am

Shit, son.  It's been like a month.  PLISS.  LET MEH ECKSPLAYN.  So, my gramma moved in and seems to have brought the Great Wall of China with her.  Sadly, she sat it right in front of my computer, so I can only journal when I'm at Niki's and she's in the shower.  XD  Anyway, to update the world, Halloween was totally amazing, I'm definitely going to find out what the health food store has to offer (jobwise) and switch if it's good.  The deli life is simply not my cup of meat.  But that's old news.  For people who I've already told, at least.  XD  Cameron's decided he wants to be famous, so he's not holding in his talents so much anymore and is becoming much more brave about expressing it.  It inspires me to do the same.  The snow is here.  Thanksgiving's going to be broken up because my mom's antisocial and my gramma's boxes have taken over the world.  I had a weird dream Thursday night that I was sad and giving Squirrelaroo a hug.  Friday I found out he was fired, so I decided I'm a totally awesome psychic.

Me and Niknik are having our usual blasty.  We roasted a fresh young chicken last night with fresh rosemary, little red potatoes, and golden delicous apple.  IT WAS SOOO GOOD!  Then we had gelato.  ^-^   Anne and I are going to BT(white boy from the kitchen)'s rap concert next Friday night.  It should be fun.  XD

Happy Thanksgiving!

Friday, September 26th

10:39pm

This was my first day off since LAST Friday.  If I wasn't off tomorrow too I'd murder Cindy.

I apologize for being a little out of it right now.  After all of my healthy eating recently, the sugar, salt, and chemicals I loaded up on today are making me a bit loopy... since my body's not used to them anymore.

Sometimes I wonder what my life would be like if this or that happened to be different.

If I'd never gone through hell with Chelsea, would I still trust people?

Or have ever become such a good poet?

If I hadn't tried to use Bridget as a stairway to popularity in seventh grade and seen into "their" world, how long would I have wanted to be friends with the popular girls before realizing what they were really like?

If I wasn't shy growing up, would I be a partying slut?

Would that be as fun as it looks... if it wasn't so empty?

Do I just wonder about that because I feel like I was deprived of  the whole "dating" part of life, like I just... picked a husband?

As glad as I am to have been handed the most beautiful flower, I feel like I missed my chance to walk through the field.

If I'd met Cameron before I quit being shallow, would I have even given him the time of day?

If I'd never met him, how much longer would I have survived alone?

If I lost him, what would become of me?

What would I be like if I'd had a father?

Or if I'd never met the sad creature that claims to be mine?

Or if I didn't spend my whole life wishing I had something... money to get what I need, people to be close to who care, something to make me feel like my time here is worth anything.

Will I ever feel secure enough to risk having children?

Will I ever look at sex as not being a terrifying risk?

Will I ever stop having pimples?

Who's driving me to work on Sunday?

If slicing meat is how I earn my living, what is my life?

The two days a week I spend typing journals and waiting for Cameron to fit me into his schedule?

I need a car.

Ugh.

I played my clarinet today.

It was the first time in five years.

I showed my mom the biggest spider I've ever seen in my yard today.

She killed it.

9:30pm

The new health food shop is going to be right near my work.  It will be four times the size of the original store, and have a juice bar in it.  There's still no official opening date yet.  I could DIE of joy.

Right down the street from the original health food shop there's also a CPS shop, a fairy/nature(/CPS?) shop, and an Irish pub (which I got stew from with Cameron today.  IT WAS SO GOOD.).  My next day off I want to walk around that area and check out all the places.  And the other health food shop across the street from the one I go to that I still haven't been to yet.  There are apartments in that area too.  And it's all in like a half hour walking distance, in a nice neighborhood.  That's where I want to live as soon as I have my degree paid for and own a car.  If I moved there right after getting my degree, I'd be paying rent out the ass and wouldn't be able to afford a car.  So even though I'll be mostly walking, I still need to get a car first.

They have mint chocolate swirl ice cream (at the original health food shop XD) that's made from rice milk.  It's AMAZING.  I think I like it better than Bryers.  No milk after-taste.  Excellent texture and flavor.  Not so good once it's melted, but it melts very slowly.  The chocolate swirls are fudgey and minty.  Not sure if I like that so much.  The new store should have more flavors.  I think they have it at Giant Beagle too.  Maybe they have more flavors.  Unless they only have the rice milk, and not the ice cream.  Anyway, it's called Good Karma (Rice Divine).  Let's check it oooout!

I want to make a work people list too.  Yes.

Cindy (aka: Hitler/Christine2):  Self explanatory.

Anne:  HILARIOUS.  25.  Has a 5 year old daughter.  I thought she was like eighteen and was so shocked about the kid.  LOL   We take the (breaded) soooole train to Clam Town whenever one (or one hundred) opens up, and we mimic Hitler when she's off.  We salute each other when it's time for our lunch breaks.

Justin (aka: Daddy/Captain/Squirrelaroo):  Jealous because he was off the day me and Anne formed 67687963123 inside jokes.  Slacker.  Dave the Laugh.  Drinks and parties a lot.  Squirrelaroo is his species, because stores cheese for winter in his apron pouch.  (Me and Anne are GENIUSES.).  Went to L.A. to try to become a DJ right before I started working there, came back a week later.  Currently trying to figure out if he's capable of developing musical taste.  I'll determine that after he plays some music from the band he was raving about yesterday.  Calls me Meat Man. Smoker (ick, elch, eltche).  We talk about cartoons.  Cameron hates him with a passion.

Jenn:  Went to our "rival school" and does a lot of black head motions when she's got an attitude.  Round, with glasses, same age as me.  I steal her customers and she tries to crush my arms when I try to get meat out of the case.  XD  She tells me about how her old boyfriend cheated on her and how she thought she might have been pregnant a while back.  I sit there and nod, trying not to hurl at the idea of someone touching a person that physically terrifying.  She constantly tells me I'm weird.  I tell her I know.  Anne can't stand her.  Justin asked if I'd stab her with a poison dart in the break room if he gave me one.  I said I'd think about it.

Pam:  Tiny, cute grandma type.  From England, and therefore so much fun to hear talk.  All of our customers from the UK talk to her, and bring her newspapers from London, etc.  Really cool.

Ed:  Best person to close with 'cause he's so laid back.  Probably in like his sixties.  From New York.  Light-hearted.  Hates Cindy's bullshit.  Starts chats when it's not busy instead of making us clean the world in silence.

Mary:  Greatest demo person ever.  Me and Anne always hope she's going to give out samples.  Speaks kind of slowly.  Really nice.  "Come on over here and get a sample.  I have breaded soooole.  I have clams here ready for sampling.  One just opened up."   Good times, good times.  When I brought Cameron in to introduce him to everyone, she said we were so cute walking around the... stooore together.  ^-^

Maryanne:  Usually nice, but snapped at us for talking the other day (bizarre).  She's the one who sneakily threw away chicken because she was annoyed by Cindy being Cindy.  She shakes.  Like a chihuahua.

Myra:  Nice.  In her forties or fifties.  Good to close with.  She said she likes closing with me.  ^-^  Her and Justin joking around together is REALLY hilarious.  She laughs really hard at a lot of the "that's what she said" type of jokes.  Only they're usually worse.  XD  She'd make a much better manager than Cindy.

The Sushi Chef (whose name I still don't know):  Really nice.  Cute.  Thick Japanese accent.  Should let Niki live with her.  LOL

That's everyone in the deli (I hope I didn't forget anyone  LOL).  Unless you count a couple people from the seafood department who come over to help when we're short-handed.  Outside of the deli there's my friends from school, Mary who trained me (I'm her unofficial dietician XD), John from the kitchen, and Cathy and Corrine up front who I talk to the most in the breakroom.

I got my first five-day-week paycheck yesterday. 

$240

I deserve a juicer.

Then I'll move it faster, faster, faster, faster.

Wednesday, September 10th

Noonish

Only two days off this week.  Today and Friday.  I fucking NEED a day off after closing with Cindy last night.  She makes us do twice as much as anyone else makes us, and every time she walks past me, she goes,"Faster, faster, faster, faster!"  SHUT.  UP!  MY ARMS WILL NOT MOVE FASTER THAN THIS WITHOUT FLYING OFF OF MY BODY.  GO.  AWAAAAY.

The store was closed.  The customers were all gone.   The EMPLOYEES were all gone.  Except for me, Justin, and Cindy.  Yet, for some reason, it is inappropriate to talk while I'm cleaning the glass on the meat display case.

I was already pissed at her for being such an annoying bitch, and for having to clean ALL THREE slicers that night because there were only two of us closing the deli (Cindy had to close up the seafood department because the guy who was supposed to got hurt in culinary school today).  But.  Even though I'd been working my ass off and putting up with her shit for the past nine hours (THAT'S RIGHT KIDS, NINE FUCKING HOURS OF CINDY) I wasn't allowed to make idle conversation to take my mind off of murdering her in the face.  FINE.  I'LL JUST GO FASTERFASTERFASTERFASTER.  MY RAGE FUELS MY ARM.  AND MY MURDEROUS PLOT.  ENJOY.

"Nooo taaaalkING!  You need to be working!"

"We can do both at the same time!  (forced happy tone)"

"No you can't!  If you're looking up at him you're not looking at what you're cleaning."

What?!  I didn't even know where the fuck he was at.  I just responded to a voice from beyond the counter.  SHUT.  UP.  CINDY.  THIS IS NOT STUDY HALL.  I HATE YOU.

"I wasn't looking up at him."

"*hushedgrumble*"

And as if that were not enough, they had to shut the power off because they're doing something to the freezers or something.  I don't know.  But, Cindy had us rush over to the machine to punch out, BUT IT WAS TOO LATE.  WOW.  SO, A FUCKING HALF HOUR AFTER WE'RE SUPPOSED TO LEAVE IS TOO LATE.  IMAGINE THAT.  So, she had us go fasterfasterfasterfaster back to the deli, and I was THOROUGHLY PISSED, rushing round like a fucking maniac, and slipped on the floor (I didn't know Justin had just mopped.  I was too consumed by my attempt to burn a hole through the glass I was cleaning with my fasterfasterfaster arm.)  and landed flat on my ass (and killed myself).  It was a classic Charlie Brown football kick fall, without so many flips.

She was acting all fucking concerned.  Concerned that I might report her ass and jeopardize her fucking JOB maybe.  It's her WHOLE FUCKING LIFE.   She is the ONLY person I've met there who talks about nothing but work.  Justin told me she has kids!  SHE HAS NEVER MENTIONED HAVING CHILDREN, A HUSBAND, A PET, A FRIEND, A THOUGHT, OR ANYTHING BUT MEAT AND CHEESE.  DIE ALREADY!

Me and Justin had a very serious discussion about this (while she was at her 2 o'clock meeting and the employees were allowed to speak) and decided that no one would fuck that.  The kids are either a lie, adopted, or were artificially inseminated.  No one would even rape her.  She'd be talking about stock levels.  Who gets off on that?

Anyway, when we FINALLY got out of there (9 fucking 15 pm), I was on the bench in front of the store trying to release all of the day's frustration by crying and ranting to Cameron on the phone, when Cindy comes around the fucking corner and starts talking to me!  "Are you okay?  How long until your ride gets here?  Do you want me to wait with you?'   WTF?!  NO!  GET THE HELL AWAY FROM ME!!!  IT'S HARD TO BITCH ABOUT YOU WHEN YOU'RE A FOOT AWAY.  IT'S YOUR FUCKING FAULT I'M ENRAGED AND HAVE A THROBBING ASS-BRUISE RIGHT NOW.  DON'T TRY TO MAKE YOURSELF FEEL LESS GUILTY BY PRETENDING TO CARE.  YOU ONLY CARE ABOUT GETTING IN TROUBLE FOR HARASSING AND CAUSING INJURY TO CUTE HAPPY NEW EMPLOYEES THAT THE MANAGER ABOVE YOU LIKES.  YEAH.  MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE TOLD HIM WHAT A GREAT JOB I WAS DOING SO FAR.   MAYBE YOU SHOULD HAVE KILLED YOURSELF INSTEAD.  HAVE A GOOD EVENING.  I HOPE YOUR CHILDREN KILL YOU IN YOUR SLEEP.  YOU KNOW THEY WANT TO.

Tuesday, September 2nd

10:30pm

I just got home.  UGH.  It was nice to not have to leave the house until 10am today, but I didn't fucking get home until ten PM.  I'm so exhausted.  I hate all the shit we have to do at closing.  Opening is a LOT less stressful.  You don't have Cindy bitching at you to hurry up about every three and a half seconds.  Plus the actual work itself sucks.  Garbage, dishes, Cindy bitching, picking scorching hot meat off of chicken bones (FOREVER), Cindy bitching, cleaning everything, Cindy bitching.  You get the bitchure.

No one can stand Cindy's bitching.  This sweet old lady, Maryanne (which is ironic to hear from me, because Cameron's demon-mother shares the same name) got so pissed about it that she started to sneakily throw away some of the chicken I was picking the meat off of so we could all go home sooner.  It was SO funny.  XD

Today, I bought a quart of fresh-squeezed orange juice and a giant thing of spinach.  I finished all the orange juice by lunch, and had half of the spinach.  I felt so healthy.  XD 

Then I had a milkshake.

YAY!

Wednesday, August 27th

4pm

I get paid for my training!  YESSS!  It was so exhausting, though, so I'm sort of not surprised.  LOL  4pm-8pm Monday and yesterday.  Mostly handouts, videos, and paperwork.  But I did get to shadow for quite a while yesterday.  I was taught how to use and clean the meat slicer.  The scales look really confusing though.  They punch in like a million numbers after they weight stuff.  How do they know what to push?  I'll let you know when I find out. XD

I get an hour lunch, and a fifteen minute break.  And I joined the muthafuckin' union.  XD  My department manager's name is Cindy.  It was SO hard to not be like, "HI CINDY!!!"  Like I did with Jonjon's Cindy every time she was nearby.  XD

There was this one video that's supposed to be "funny".  The only funny thing about it was how TERRIBLE the acting was.  It (like everything else in our fucking training) was all about customer service.  And EVERY time a customer was treated well, they said "WOOOW!" 

There were two other new guys (Stephen in dairy and Alex in produce, both from a nearby Catholic school, though Alex just graduated) who started the same day I did, and while me and Alex watched the WOW video, Stephen was downstairs doing a customer service computer quiz thing with Mary (who's was doing all of our customer service training.  Out of everyone I've met so far she's my favorite, though everyone is SO nice).  So, when it was Stephen's turn to watch the video, we told him to count the wows.  LMFAO  I don't know if he actually did, though.  He's very quiet.  And for once, I'm not.  XD  Except with some of the cashiers who look like they might be snobby.  I'm still careful around them.  But yeah, if I ever get to train people, I'm definitely counting the wows next time I see that.

And yesterday, I saw Lindsay!  Michelle's sister.  We were choir buddies back in the day, and she was best friends with Mesa.  I had NO idea she worked there!  We were very excited, and caught up on each others' lives (I was early, and she'd pop over between bagging groceries).  She was like,"If you're ever working an eight hour shift...*nod*  lunch."  XD!!!  She graduated a year before me, and other than a "Hi, Lindsay!" in the Land O'Lakes halls a couple times last year, I haven't really talked to her since her graduation party.  It's funny.  I knew her longer, but ended up a lot closer with Michelle.  I guess we just have more in common.  I still haven't asked her how her China trip was.  TO MYSPACE!

BUT FIRST.  I MUST SAY THIS.

THE BAKERY.

IS MY WEAKNESS.

NIKI.  I WILL BRING YOU NOMS.

I should bring you to the store so you can pick out favorite noms.

Here's a list of all the people I've met (and remembered):

• Bob (Manager)
• Sean (knew from school, manager's son)
• Alex (produce)
• Stephen (dairy)
• Danielle (knew from school)
• Lindsay (knew from school)
• Jen (also in deli.  hate that I'm not the only one.  my name tag has to say Jennifer now instead.  I might change it to Jenni before I start interacting with customers.  No one calls me that anymore but Cameron and sometimes aunts and uncles.  And I'm sure Devin would if he knew who I was.  LMFAO  Anyway, I miss it.)
• Mary (basically everything)
• Anne (deli)
• Maryanne (deli)
• Cindy (deli manager)
• Nick (dairy manager)
• Cory (female. customer service desk)

And I met at least another ten people whose names I can't remember.  Mary introduced us to EVERYONE we walked past.  It was a bit overwhelming, but everyone was very welcoming.  Thank god for name tags, eh?

Also!  I has a uniform!  It's kind of cute, but everything is so big on me.  XD  Because it's in "ladies sizes" instead of juniors, which would fit me.  Black baseball cap (the visor was cuter, but it hurt my head and kept sliding down my face), hairs in a ponytail (all of them.  XD  Just because I'm in deli), light blue button-up shirt, black apron, black shoes (or white), black (or khaki, or dark blue) pants (which you supply).  No facial piercings, and "offensive" tattoos must be covered.  And no more than three piercings per ear, and two rings per hand.  I don't think hair color is an issue, because there's a black lady who works in the kitchen with BRIGHT red-orangey hair.  But that might be because she doesn't do as much customer interaction.  I'm not sure.  Boys need to have hair above shoulder length, and no facial hair.  Basically, most of our customers are old people, who are easily frightened or offended... and most of all, OBSCENELY judgemental.

Thaaat's right, folks!  I got the job!  I am officially a deli girl at the fancy grocery store.  XD  And I start right away!  My first training session is in three and a half hours. 

The interview went really well.  I was too excited to get nervous.  LOL  And everyone was really friendly.  All both of them.  XD  The hiring manager and the lady at the customer service desk. 

EIGHT BUCKS AN HOUR!  HELL.  YES.

^-^

Also, I seem to have made a friend on the bus.  This guy was at my stop and started talking to me.  I like meeting new people and everything, but it freaks me out when older guys know where I live.  Luckily he comes from the opposite direction to get to the bus stop.  But anyway, we talked some on the bus (your basic "What are you up to today?" sort of conversation) and then I saw him again on the way home.

He works at retard school near the mall and found out his "group" was going to the zoo today, so he was heading back home.  But yeah, out of fuckin' nowhere, he hands me this big picture of Wonder Woman.  I was utterly confused.  He said he was an artist and drew it (this was a print, which he said typically sells for like fifty bucks), and that he had planned on giving it to this girl he'd gone on a date with, but she never called him back.  Weird, right?  I made sure to throw my boyfriend's existence into one of the next topics just in case.  But yeah.  Nice guy.  Like an uncle, only kinda creepy.

Also.

There was an Englishman on the bus, and he was talking to the bus driver, and I had fun listening.  XD

Also.

I HAS A JARB!!!

Wish me luck with the meat slicer.  EEEE!