32 posts tagged “work”
Monday, November 23rd
10:24pm
I have a ton of energy coursing through me, and no matter how I try to use it, nothing seems like what I'm supposed to be doing right now. It's the most frustrating feeling. Sean came over and me, him, and Young Bryan were all playing our drums. I just couldn't get it right. It was one of those off-nights where you can't seem to keep a steady rhythm, or you lose your feel for every beat you start. And it made me go,"Oh, well I guess I shouldn't be playing my drum right now. I should do something else." And everything since then that I've thought of or started to do is just... not it. I can't find what I need. Sort of like when you're really hungry, and you have a taste for something, but you just can't place it. It's driving me crazy.
And it really doesn't help that its ten-thirty and I'm nearing the time when I'll do that thing where I lay down and suddenly it's time to go to work. I don't like having a job. I don't like money. Or that people have to use it in order to survive in most places. I need a place to go where I can be free. But I know the only place that can change my freedom-status is in my mind. I'm only as free as I let myself be. I can't be a slave to my thoughts. When I learn to control them I'll be free.
I don't write much these days. I don't like that.. I miss long days of solitude between my school days and work days. I'm so busy lately. I need a sabbatical hardcore. I hate my job. I'm so tired of being on my feet for eight hours, with some douche bags who don't know shit about shit breathing down my neck every time I blink. I just want to live my own life. Spend my time on more important things. Not be so exhausted when I do have some of my own time. I just want out.
But I don't know where to go.
The more I know, the less I understand.
On the bright side, I'm practicing driving and learning astrology.
And I'm getting really good at bellydance.
And I had amazing sex today.
Which caused the carpet to break the skin on my back.
And the neighbor to knock on the door.
So worth it.
93
Thursday, October 15th
9-10pm
Two things are currently coursing through my mind.
The first is a very sudden and very strong desire to make out with a really beautiful girl with lips as soft as mine feel right now. There are, however, none currently in my apartment with me, and I wouldn't know where to begin to look for one within walking distance... in the dark and cold. Which brings me to thing two.
The Venus Project. And its activist arm, The Zeitgeist Movement.
If you're unfamiliar with the two things in thing two (XD) I highly recommend that you educate yourself on what they are. The easiest way is through this movie.
I've come up with a more responsible plan. See, six people are quitting where I work now: Lisa baker, Sonny chef, Melissa juice bar/register, Jessica juice bar/register, Cammy juice bar/register, Teresa office (and we're already sooo understaffed), and I reeeally didn't want to be there to pick up the slack (seeing as I already do the work of two to three people as it is), which was my main motivation for g-ing tfo. Buuuut I've decided to suck it up. Once they hire some more people and have them trained well enough for the bizniss to be a bit more stable (ha!) I'll just cut to part time. I decided I really need to keep saving up for a car right now, and because Young Bryan could split and go to an ashram at any time (he's a bit flighty XD), and I'd be screwed with all these bills and no jarb. LOL
Also, I bought this:
YAY!
Sunday
April 19th
5:45pm
As of late, it's been pretty effin' snazzy.
I decided to go with a Brother, sewing machine-wise, but I still haven't begun learning to use it yet. I've been very busy.
I've spent a lot of time making good friends since Niki left. I'll have to introduce her to all of them WHEN SHE VISITS *AHEM*. XD
Me and Alison (friend from work who recently quit) have begun a quest to find the best Irish pub's stew, and she's very excited to have a friend who likes the Disney channel. XD We're also filming a music video for our (soon to be chart topping) song "I'm on a Goat".
Young Bryan (also from work, but hasn't quit yet XD) is my newest best friend. Hanging out with him is like being with my sister again. I really missed that sort of wild freedom. We romp through the woods, talk about what we think of... pretty much everything, and he's introducing me to the world of hippies. XD One of those hippies may in fact provide the very goat for me and Alison's video. XD!!!! Oh, and we're writing a story about foxgoose-goosefox. Details on that will unravel as the tale does, I'm sure.
My great-grandmother (91) died last week, so I spent a week in West Virginia for the funeral. All my gramma's kids were in the same room for the first time since my mom's wedding (1982). It was really cool to have them all together like that. I met a lot of family I'd never seen before. And I realized just how big my family really is. I'm one of forty-two great-grandchildren.
It was my first funeral, so I was really nervous and cried a LOT, and this 12 year old kid put suckers in the coffin.
I saw a road. It was called Road Run Road. I LOVED IT.
Cameron met a French Canadian. From Russia. He's offered him a hundred thousand dollar Jaguar and two thousand bucks a month to run this recording studio he's building in Montreal, watch his house there, something about importing alcohol in Florida, and maybe managing a hobby store. Hopefully just not all at once. XD The place isn't quite built yet, and I think Cameron's getting his erm... audio degree or whatever you call it before this happens... but it's a pretty amazing opportunity. I'm really excited for him. ^-^
The band he's managing is sounding pretty damn good on their new record (I've been going to the studio while they recorded a bit) and they're in a battle of the bands at a local festival coming up.
I'm going on a camping trip this weekend that's going to be SUCH a blast. There's like, a million concerts going on all night, tons of people will be there, and classes! Young Bryan's teaching yoga, Mike (one of the six fired from work FOR NO REASON AUGH) is teaching jujitsu, so who knows what other cool stuff'll be there? I can't wait!
Niki's online! Yay!
It's 10pm and I should probably go to sleep.
There's a chicken chalupa on the other side of the wall that's been trying to sweet-talk me for hours.
My mom won't heat the room I've been in all day, because she says she can't afford it.
Even though gramma just bought a heater that uses just ten cents worth of electricity per day when run all day.
On top of the fact that gramma is also now paying her hundreds in rent per month.
And she's been getting $25 per week from me.
I'm going to the dealership (hahaha!) with Cameron tomorrow to buy a sewing machine.
Then to his long lost (thanks to his mother) sister's house for a visit.
I really shouldn't eat that taco.
I shouldn't eat anything at all this close to bed.
It probably tastes like shit after sitting for so long anyways.
I haven't seen Niki in ages.
She never even tried to get a hold of me when she got back in town.
Actually, she never tries to get a hold of me. I always end up seeking her out.
I think my stomach wants to growl.
I ran out of healthy food. Basically.
I have two carrots and a lemon. And a chalupa. Fuck.
I'm not going to like weekdays at work without Debbie.
Fridays and Saturdays are the only time the other girls are there when I am.
I'll get so lonely.
They better hire me a friend.
I'm tired. I'm going to bed. Hopefully the taco won't catch me on my way there.
Tuesday
March 10th
8:22pm
My best friend at work, Debbie, has decided that Thursday will be her last day on the job. The owner's an egotistical wopzilla who hates people he can't piss off, and therefore terrorizes the world trying to single those people out. Debbie's not one of those people, so she... uh... got pissed off enough to quit. I'm really gonna miss her. She was the only person there who I really felt I could talk to, especially about work-related problems. Hopefully I'll still get to see her sometimes. Her sister is a manager at a pizza place 10min from her house, whereas our current workplace is nearly an hour's drive for her. She'll be going there and managing three days a week.
I was hired in mid-December. Since then, six people have been fired, and now we're losing Debbie. I'm still the newest person there, and one of VERY few people trained in the juice bar. I really hope they decide to hire another person, because I've lately been doing the work of two people... and would prefer that the number not inflate. It's becoming more and more like the deli every day. But I can't quit here.
At least not yet. I want to have at least six months here for my future applications since my last job I only lasted three months at before quitting.
And I like my employee discount.
A lot.
I also want to kill my mother.
All she does is make me cry.
I have to move out. Soon.
Fuck her. She's not getting any more of my money.
WILL SOMEONE PLEASE TEACH ME TO DRIVE SO I CAN GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE?!
10:30pm
He's just gone out to put in Geepie's new headlights.
He said he doesn't want to let his baby freeze.
He's offered to drive me to work until gramma gets back, so long as I give him money for the gas.
I could cry.
Okay, I am crying.
I'm grateful, but I still feel so helpless.
10pm
Cameron's parents are going to a doctor's appointment tomorrow around 8am, so he says that he can't take me to work because they need the car. Even though there are two vehicles. Three if you count Geepie, which it's too cold to put new headlights in tonight. That's a load of rubbish. He just doesn't want them to see that he's taking me.
This is fucking ridiculous. I don't want to walk 45min through a scary city in the dark and cold.
And I don't want to get up at the crack of the middle of the night and spend an hour and a half wandering around Giant Beagle waiting for my second bus to start running, before standing in the cold for a half hour at the stop.
And I certainly don't want to miss another day of work because of this nonsense. Six people have already been fired, and they weren't even fired for REASONS.
Now he's calling me. Oh, for heaven's sake.
Tuesday
February 17th
9:30pm
I'M BACK! And better than ever. >;D
A pathway through my grandma's wall of boxes has FINALLY been cleared enough for me to get to the computer. 'Bout time, eh? I've been working my little pat00tie off earning moneys and watching a million people get fired. And my kuzn/besty flew away. And my fish died. But my kuzn's flying back next week ALIVE and my fishy lived a long, fulfilling life, so all is right with the world.
Best of all, I've decided to never go to Cameron's house again because of his mother's most recent bitchnonsense. I haven't been there in a few weeks and it's seriously improved my mental health. AND my relationship. I actually enjoy the time I spend with Cameron now. It's wonderful.
HOWEVER. What's not wonderful is the fact that gramma's in Florida, and the busses don't run early enough to take me to work. And I forgot AGAIN to call the other busses for a ride and now it's too late, so I have to beg Cameron to take me to work the next two days. Which he might not be tooo upset about because we had a very good day today. >;D But no, he's been so sweet about helping me. I hate having the busses pick me up from my house, because all these really creepy people on there see EXACTLY where I live. NOT. FUN.
Speaking of creepy people. There's like. 3,215,632,672,643 of them buying juice from me daily. And they're all male. If you catch my drift. Which I think you do. This one guy gave me a MIX CD. WHAT?! NO! GET YOUR REPTILIAN RUSSIAN UNIBROW AWAY FROM ME, THANK YOU! And Creepy Joe gives me a five dollar tip every Saturday, and winks and makes kissy faces at all of us poor girls.
Pas terrible.
Georgia Nicolson's two most recent books of confessioniness are now in my noggin. And bookshelf.
I'm dying to get my hands on the VERY LAST ONE EVER. And the movie. Which was never released in US theaters for some ready-to-make-me-murder-people reason.
Wonder what number she'll get up to before the series ends.
Oo-er.
BIG, beautiful snowstorm. Slow day at work, shoveling ma grande montagne.
Mall with Camcam to build My Hello Kitty, and I bought this Hello Kitty Daily (PDA software for Nintendo DS) that I'm writing my tiny journals in, and transferring to here later on. XD
